Pain Splattered Tear Drops
by WiccaWoman17587
Summary: "I stare at her across the room, enveloped in his arms again and I feel the bitter sting of jealousy course through me." To have a taste of her is better than nothing at all. Sometimes.
1. Chapter 1

**So I was listen to Ed Sheeran's album '+', and whilst I love all of the songs, 'Gimme Love' always sticks out for me. I'm a big believer that some of the best writing is done to music, particularly when the music inspires you directly. **

**This is the result of sticking the song on repeat and letting my fingers do the typing. Sorry for angsty-ness of it. I'm sure other people interpret the song differently. But that's the beauty of music. :)**

**I hope you enjoy it. Reviews are most welcome, encouraged even. :)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Glee. Rated M for mature themes. FemSlash. Don't like, don't read. :D**

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I stare at her across the room, enveloped in his arms again and I feel the bitter sting of jealousy course through me. With a heavy sigh I make an excuse to leave the party by waving my empty cup in front of me. I find myself alone in the kitchen. I throw my cup in the bin and move through the large sliding doors onto the tile patio area. The cool crisp air hits the skin that is exposed and it puckers in response; layers of goose pimples covering my arms and back. I make no effort to stave off the chill, instead I welcome a feeling other than the overwhelming despair I've been immersed in for the past hour.

A deep rumble from above me captures my attention and as I turn my face towards the sky the first drop of rain collides with the ground. More and more join it and soon the biting droplets are soaking me through. I close my eyes, open my arms and greet the blissful cold water with a smile, moving on to the grass and wiggling my toes through the damp blades. The facial expression feels foreign to me. Soon I'm thankful for the rain as my tears begin mixing into the ragged streams making their way down my cheeks. I know the alcohol is the catalyst for the emotion but it's a long overdue release from the mental prison I've been keeping myself in.

"What are you doing Quinn?" I almost don't hear the tiny voice from behind me, a mere whisper when it reaches my ears. I don't turn, I don't move.

"I love the rain. It's cleansing." I supply, as if that really answers the deeper question. A gentle rustle announces her presence beside me but still I don't move.

"I mean, why did you leave?" She probes. I force myself to stay still; eyes closed and praying to the skies to be liberated of these feelings.

"You know why Rachel," is all I can muster. She reaches up and grips my wrist delicately. My head snaps to the side and her coffee brown eyes draw me in. Her dark blue shirt and black skirt are soaked through and she is bare foot, the same as me. I lower both of my arms and turn to her, ignoring every voice in my head warning my not to carry on. To turn back to the house and run. I lift a hand to brush away the hair sticking to her forehead and she leans into the touch. My breath comes in fits and starts as my concentration breaks. She cups my hand with her own, running her thumb over my knuckles. My gaze flicks over her features quickly, taking in each for a moment then moving on, never getting enough to sate my urges.

The pad of my thumb traces circles over her cheek and down to her mouth, drawing across her full bottom lip. Her breath hitches in her throat and she closes her eyes, tipping her head up. I swallow forcefully and try to rein in my desire. I fail miserably when her mouth opens and her tongue peeks out to caress the digit. The breath rushes from my lungs as I connect our lips and she returns the sentiment forcefully. The rational part of my brain remembers we are out in the open and I begin moving us around to the side of the house, out of sight from prying eyes.

She gasps when her back hits the wall and I take the opportunity to seek out her tongue with my own. A moan escapes from my throat when she nips at my lip gently and my hands move of their own accord. One slips under the drenched shirt, the other traces over her hip to her ass. She groans and arches her body into me when I squeeze. Not satisfied with the level of contact we already have, my other hand joins its partner and lifts. She quickly gets the message and wraps her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I press her into the wall harder, feeling her skirt ride up as her core presses into the flimsy material covering my torso.

I run both hands down her thighs; dragging my nails, then I push back up, sliding underneath her skirt and lifting it to her hips. Her fingers tangle through my hair, tugging harshly at the roots and it serves only to heighten my arousal. I bite down on her neck then flick my tongue over the mark to soothe it in response. She growls into my hair and bows into me, the movement causing friction where she needs it. She repeats the action with a moan and I feel her hot wetness on my abs. The motion angers me and arouses me in equal parts but my anger wins and I press into her again, giving her no room to move. She opens her eyes and her gaze finds mine, her once chocolate orbs turned black in want.

I manoeuvre my arm between us and hook a finger around her ruined panties to pull them aside. She gasps and jolts when I find her core. I slam my eyes shut and bite back a moan when I feel how wet she is. I small part wonders if that's from me, or when she was sat on his lap. Her hands turn my head and she gazes down at me hotly. She seems to read my emotions when she presses her lips to my ear. "All for you. Always for you." A growl rips from my throat and I push two fingers into her. She cries out brokenly and presses down. I marvel at the feeling of her clenched around me and I start thrusting, picking up a rhythm quickly. She uses her legs for leverage and matches my pace easily; little moans and grunts accompanying each drive.

I easily ignore the burning in my wrist and legs; my sole concern is bringing pleasure to the beautiful woman in my arms. I press a thumb to her clit and hiss when she digs her nails into my exposed back. It doesn't take much longer for her come undone around my fingers and as she cries out for the final time a loud crack of thunder ripples overhead, masking the noise to everyone but me. I remove my hand and press it to the wall, keeping our balance as fatigue makes its way through my body. She pulls in two or three big breaths before opening her eyes to stare at me. Her gaze flitters away for a second and she unwraps her legs from around me, dropping gently to the floor. She smooths my tangled hair away from my face and meets my eyes once more.

Her fingers don't stop touching me, instead marking a path down my neck and across any skin that is uncovered. A shiver that has nothing to do with the rain makes its way down my back and I revel in her ministrations. My eyes flicker closed and a sense of peace settles over me. Her path leads her to my already hard nipples and she flicks them gently through the thin material causing me to moan softly. She grasps my ribs and spins us round, so my back is pressed firmly to hard wall. Her digits continue on their journey and soon they reach the waistband of my black pants. She unhooks the clips and pulls the zipper down, all the while her gaze never leaving my face. I grip the back of her neck and pull her into me, lips clashing forcefully. This action seems to spur her on and she delves into my panties, fingertips finding my hot core with ease.

A quiet, "Oh God," passes her lips and she renews her attack on me, moving her mouth along my jaw, planting sweet kisses along its length. I let out a strangled whimper when she enters me with two fingers and my head drops back to meet the rough surface of the wall. Her kisses move to my neck and she sucks hard at my pulse point. There are too many sensations for me to try and keep up; the tingle of the rain as it hits my skin, the heat of her mouth, the graze of her nails and the movement of her fingers inside me, so I give up trying and just lose myself in the moment. She keeps her thrusts slow at first; teasing me and I cant my hips forward to try to convey my need. I feel her smile against my collarbone. With a final kiss to the skin there she speeds up her rhythm, curling her fingers with each push. I grip onto her as if my life depends it, not caring to censor the words spilling from my mouth every now and then. "Fuck. There…Don't stop," rushes out my mouth somewhat coherently. Blinding white flashes behind my eyelids as I squeeze my eyes shut, pleasure washing over me. I'm unsure if it's the result of her actions or if there was lightening forking across the sky.

As the feeling passes, reality slaps me in the face and I open my eyes when the threat of tears becomes too much. I focus on her, pink cheeked and breathing heavily, and let the tears fall; still concealed in the torrent of rain. I notice the flare of her nostrils and the dimples in her chin and realise she is crying as well. My heart breaks and I reach out to her. She falls into my embrace readily and I feel her chest heave as she sobs. "It's ok," I soothe quietly. Her head shakes against me.

"It's not, Quinn," she counters. "I know it's not." She leans back and I can't identify the look in her eyes. "I lo-"

"Rachel?" He shouts from the patio doors. Her eyes fly wide open and she begins straighten up in a panic. She pulls her skirt down and plasters her hair back before walking around the side of the house. "There you are. What are you doing out here?" I hear him say.

"I just wanted to get some air, I was so hot," she replies unconvincingly. I hear the click of the door closing and slide to the ground, letting the sobs wrack through my body until I have nothing left to give.

"I love you too," I tell the silence.

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**A/N: You can make your own mind up about the timing/placement of the fic. I had none in mind. Likewise with the 'him' you can decide who he is.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Soooo, this took way longer than I had planned to write out. In my defense, I had planned for PSTD to be a one shot. Which meant I had to actually think of how this should play out. It also meant I had quite a lot of writers block (I know.. it's so short!). I'm done with the excuses lol.  
So I hope you like it, and that it's a satisfactory end. Lemme know what you think, even if it's bad. Any critique is good, right?**

**Disclaimer: Same as always.**

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Her almost admission troubles me for days. Was it an admission for me or about him? Was she protesting that she loved him and couldn't continue with our torrid affair? I make a decision to track her down before class on Monday.

"Can I talk to you?" I ask gently though we are alone. She looks at me questioningly. I know I am breaking one of the terms of our arrangement. 'No personal interaction at school.' It is a mutual agreement to prevent suspicion and stigma.

"Sure," she answers cautiously. She finishes packing her things into her bag before shutting her locker and leading me into the choir room. It is well before school is due to start so there is next to no chance of us being interrupted. She takes a seat on the piano bench, dropping her bag to the floor and looks at me expectantly. I take a breath and hold it while counting to five. She shifts on the stool and her gaze bores into me intensely. Nerves stir in my stomach and the thought of backing out isn't far from my mind.

"It's about us. Whatever 'us' is." I begin. She stands at my words, a gentle smirk blossoming on her beautiful face.

"Kiss me," she requests confidently. I huff in frustration and ignore her advances.

"I'm being serious Rachel," I admonish. A look of mock shame mars her features briefly before being replaced by the same teasing smirk as before. She steps closer to me, fingers reaching to toy with the floral buttons on my sun dress.

"So am I Quinn. I want you to kiss me. I want your mouth on me." She emphasises each statement by popping open a fastening, exposing my matching yellow bra. My mouth suddenly goes dry and I forget how to breathe. I'm unable to recall pretty much everything but the taste of her skin and the feel of her wrapped around me. I half-heartedly try to fight the tide of emotions but give up too easily. It's hard to deny the woman you love anything she asks for. I grip her hips hard and push her back until the lid of the piano is biting into her spine.

"Finish what you were saying the other night." I leave no room for argument in my voice. The smirk is dropped and she parts her lips in surprise. Fear fills her eyes and she gently shakes her head. I look away disappointed and drop my hands to my side. As I turn away, her arm snakes around me and she pulls me back into her.

"Please," she whispers, desperation plain on her face. She looks so vulnerable without the air of bravado and I have the overwhelming urge to placate her. I wrap my arms around her and she lays her head on my shoulder, nuzzling into my neck. I feel the fast thumping of her heartbeat as her chest presses against me and her lips are moving soundlessly against my throat. I pull back slightly and look into her eyes, begging her give voice to her thoughts. Her bottom lip quivers slightly but she swallows and says the words I needed to hear. "I love you."

The breath rushes from my lungs and I struggle to heave in another before I crash my lips to hers in a kiss borne of passion. She envelops her arms around my neck and pulls me impossibly closer. I slip my leg between hers and press my thigh against her core. She lets out a gentle moan but I swallow it in another searing kiss. I put every ounce of emotion into it; trying to tell her that I need her. I tear away from her mouth when she grinds down on my thigh, forging a path along her jaw to her neck. I lace the soft skin with even softer kisses, interjecting with a gentle nip every now and then. She sighs contentedly against my shoulder then presses her lips to my ear.

"Make love to me?" I close my eyes at the whispered words. I feel myself nod in response. My nose brushes against her pulse point causing a noticeable tremble. I help her lift her sweater and tee off, leaving her in a black laced bra, emphasising her gentle curves. She pushes my dress from my shoulders and lets it drop to the floor. I trace the edge of her bra with a fingertip, replacing it after a few seconds with my mouth. I bite at her already hard nipple through the thin material and revel in her breathy moan.

Without words we both change positions and lower to the floor. As her back comes in contact with the cold tiles she arches her body with a giggle. "Cold," she explains. Just like that, the mood seems lighter. It is no longer about need or want; it's about expression. There is still a gentle smile playing on her lips as I lean in and capture her mouth with mine.

"I love you," I tell her as I pull away. Uncertainty dances in her eyes briefly but then she smiles and I know she believes me. Reaching between us, I rub her over her panties, eliciting another husky groan. Her fingers tangle in my short hair and she tugs me into a passionate kiss. One hand leaves my scalp and travels the expanse of my back, rounding over my hip to slip into my underwear; her fingers curling to grasp my ass and pull me closer to her. I take her bottom lip between my teeth and run my tongue over the supple flesh as I tug. A growl emanates from her chest and she drags her nails the length of my spine. I hiss through the actions and it spurs me to remove her damp panties. She sits up and urges me to do the same with insistent yanks at the material. A wry smile twists my lips before she gets her way and lies back down.

I lower myself and place languid kisses over her taut abs, marking a path to her thighs. I drag my tongue, first over her left, then her right, avoiding the area I know she really wants me to touch. I glance up to find her panting in anticipation; eyes closed and hands clenched into fists. I position myself over her sex and issue a command. "Look at me, Rach." Her eyes flash open and her nearly black orbs lock onto mine. As soon as she obeys I dip out my tongue, flicking it over the sensitive bundle of nerves, standing proud in her arousal. A guttural moan rips from her mouth and her head drops back to the floor.

"Fuck." The curse drifts down to me and I smirk against her glistening core before lapping at her soaked hole. Her hips cant upwards with each swipe of my tongue until she finds a rhythm and is practically riding my face. I finish with a gentle suck of her clit then kiss my way back up to her mouth. I find confused chocolate orbs staring at me.

"I couldn't resist a taste," I husk out. Her breath hitches in her throat and I move two fingers through her arousal, coating the digits, before pushing fully into her. Her legs wrap around my waist as her hand drags down my body, stopping only when she reaches the apex of my thighs. I grunt when she slides a finger into me, using her legs as leverage to get deeper. I thrust into her harder, moaning when she speeds up her rhythm and adds a second finger. She captures my mouth with her own, swallowing the breathy moans and pants that are thrown between us. I feel the pressuring building in my abdomen, the tingling sensation that signifies my oncoming release and tear my lips away from her. "So close," I rasp. I see the nod from Rachel.

"Me too, baby. God, so close." I smile in spite of myself and lay a chaste kiss on the tip of her nose. She giggles at the action, her laughter soon turning into a pleasant keening. My voice joined hers as pleasure wracked through my body. I registered the stinging pain of her nails digging into my shoulder but it only heightened the orgasm shooting through me. I collapse my weight onto my elbow and rest my head in the crook of her neck, moaning softly when she slowly pulls her fingers from me. A sound next to my ear draws my attention so I lift my head and take in the sight before me. With a satisfied smile on her face, Rachel holds her cum-soaked fingers to her lips. A burst of arousal shoots straight my core.

"I couldn't resist a taste," she teases, repeating my earlier words back to me. I smirk and capture her lips in a sweet yet passionate kiss, biting back a groan as I taste myself on her tongue.

"Rach?" His voice drifts into the room from the corridor and startles me into action. I push off of Rachel, smoothing my hair down as I rise and grab at my dress. I step into it and swipe Rachel's tee off the piano, handing it to her as she straightens her skirt down. I press a quick kiss to her cheek as I escape through the other door the room. I leave the door open and hover outside as I hear a few notes from the piano follow me out. "There you are Rach…Everything ok? You ok flushed."

"Hi Jesse. I'm fine. Really. Just practicing before class." I admire the conviction and strength in her voice. "But I'm glad you found me, I need to speak to you." I hear the gruff scrape of the bench moving and I guess Rachel has stood up. "I'm sorry Jesse, but I don't think this is working."

"You're breaking up with me?" His voice is full of disbelief and confusion. "Why?"

"Like I said, it isn't working and it's not prudent to pursue a relationship that is clearly ineffectual and doomed." I smiled at her words.

"Doomed? You really are a drama queen," he scoffs. I hold my breath, praying he doesn't do something stupid. "Are you seeing someone else?"

"No. This isn't about anyone else. This is about you and I. I'm sorry but I just don't feel that way about you. I tried, and while I still admire your musical ability and your vocal prowess, we just aren't compatible as a romantically involved duo. I think it would be best to remain friends." There is silence for a few seconds before a long bang echoes through the hallway. Forgetting my place, I run into the room to find Rachel stood by the piano; one hand on the lid, the other pressed to her chest as she takes deep breaths. Jesse is nowhere to be found.

"What happened?" I question as her eyes fix onto mine. "Did he hurt you?"

"Her stormed out and slammed the door." She assures me, shaking her head. I let out a sigh of relief and reach forward to pull her into my embrace. "That was close," she mumbles against my neck, the vibration of words triggering the rise of goosebumps on my skin.

"It was," I agree, knowing that neither of us regrets what happened in this room and the significant evolution of our relationship. "So, you broke up with Jesse…" I trail off, unsure of how to word my question.

"I meant what I said. I did it for me." I swallow the disappointment that threatens to bring tears to my eyes. "Now I can be happy." I nod, my chin brushing against her cheek. "With you." I lean back and look into her coffee orbs. All I see is sincerity and love. "You deserve better than me, but if you will have me, I would like to be yours." I smile, wide and genuine, as I nod my head.

"Mine."

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**A/N2: So, was it what you were expecting? I didn't want it to be Finn, as 'Guest' said, it's always Finn. I hope you liked it. **


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